My son and daughter-in-law have been married for about seven years and have two kids. With all my children now grown and living independently, my husband and I, both still working, are looking forward to retiring in about 10–15 years, around the age of 70.
My relationship with my daughter-in-law was much better before the grandchildren came into the picture. They live 30 minutes away, and she frequently tries to drop the kids off with me. Initially, I thought my son was aware of this, but a conversation revealed he had no idea. I showed him the numerous texts requesting babysitting, and he was surprised to learn that I had babysat 16 times in a month, whereas he believed it had only been twice. It turns out she had been leaving the kids with me to socialize, while my son thought she was taking them along.
To ensure clear communication, I started using a group chat with both of them, responding to her requests only there. If she spammed me with texts, I would post screenshots in the group chat for my son to address.
We discussed the situation, and she expressed a desire for her kids to have the same close relationship with their grandparents that she had. I explained that being still employed, I couldn’t commit to babysitting every other day as her grandparents had done. We compromised on having a “grandma’s day” every two weeks.
This arrangement worked for about a year, but with my son now traveling for work, the situation resurfaced. The time difference makes it difficult for him to intervene promptly. Recently, she arrived at my home unexpectedly, asking me to babysit while she went shopping. Having reached my limit, I told her I had my own life and wouldn’t be the stereotypical grandmother she envisioned. I warned that if she left the kids with me without my consent again, I would call the police for abandonment.
She called me a jerk and stormed off. Later, my son called, trying to smooth things over and suggesting I might have gone too far.
Source: Brightside
